Shimmies says #4

Waitress- "Here is your Chicken Cannelloni."

"Chicken Pantalones? They're Chicken Pants!"

Crap I hear at work

After the success of Shimmies says, I have been asked to add another segment I would like to call: 


Crap I hear at work

So here is some funny crap I heard at work today : )

 M- "Michael means god like. So I think the middle name of anyone named Michael should be the name of a god."

D- "What is Robert the god of?"

M- "Pancakes."

 

Angry Mornings

I had a dream this morning that involved a quiz about the movie Animal House and a bunch of appliances. The appliances would not stop beeping. They were refrigerators and microwaves and TVs and other random things. I could not get any of them to stop. People started making beeping noises with their mouths too. I remember at one point getting on my knees and begging them to stop.

Then I woke up and realized it was my alarm.

Shimmies Says #3

"You could write a rap song with all the scientific terms for butt."

Shimmies says #2

True story:

"WHEEEEEEEEEEE.....UUUFFF.....OW!"

Jenny- "What happened?!"

"I slid down the stairs."

Jenny- "Why are you wearing a sleeping bag?"

"All my pants are in the wash."

Shimmies

I started a tumblr. Then I realized I don't need a tumblr. I have this blog. I was momentarily lead astray by the ideas of new page design and the like. I already have this page and a deviant art account (actually 2 deviant art accounts). I need to stop making more pages!

So I'm sticking with you Floyd.JPG

I don't need a new shiny type of blog. If this blog starts to get bland than I need to make it better...not give up on it.

With that said I would like to add a new segment to my blog called Shimmies says. Shimmies is my brother. I have had a few coworkers and friends ask him to start his own blog because he  says the most entertainingly random things on a daily basis. He didn't really show a lot on interest in this so I decided I could start taking down some of the random things he says for him.

So now  for Shimmies says:

"I cant draw lightning if I think about it…"

“Hey, if you shine a lazer between your eyes your actually ok.” 

 “I thought of two really good puns today…but the only one I can remember is dirty.”

I had these few saved up. I will try not to dump a bunch at once in the future. YAY!

Crayons

I looove the smell of crayons. I don't know if it's because they actually smell good or if it's because they remind me of my childhood. It might be a little of both. WHY DOES COLORED WAX SMELL SO GOOD?

I keep a box on my desk at work...